A Feather on Your Path: Tomorrow's Problem
Because Tomorrow's problems belong to Tomorrow, not to you.
The What -
As you lay in bed, tossing and turning, unable to shake the weight of tomorrow's concerns from your mind, remember one thing – tomorrow's problems are just that, Tomorrow's. This realisation can be especially powerful in moments of sleeplessness, when it's easy to let anxieties about the future consume your present. By reminding yourself that tomorrow will deal with those challenges, not you, you can release the grip of worry and allow yourself to drift off into a peaceful slumber.
You can even imagine what tomorrow might look like if they were a person and how they are happily dealing with your problems the next day so you don’t need to worry about it now. You can just go to sleep and leave those problems for Tomorrow to solve.
The Why -
As I've found through personal experience, acknowledging that tomorrow's problems are not yours to worry about can be incredibly liberating. So let's take a closer look at why this is so important.
The weight of our problems can be heavy on our minds, especially when the day is done and all is quiet. Often when I went to bed, this would become a real problem for me when my mind would decide to wake right up and freak out, just as i'm about to drift off.
I would panic and say to my husband 'Oh no, we haven't done this/sorted that/I forgot to do this today etc." and he would just casually reply 'we will deal with it tomorrow', roll over and go to sleep - cool as a cucumber! I would on the other hand stay wide awake, annoyed at his ability to drift off peacefully and continue to stress and then struggle through my tiredness the following day. I just couldn't understand how he could be so relaxed about whatever it was that needed sorting tomorrow!
So after a night of worrying for me, I asked him exactly that question the next morning and being the very factual and to the point kind of person that he is, he said "I don't worry about tomorrow's problems because they are tomorrow's." The way he said it made it sound as if tomorrow was a person, an entity or being of some kind and that those problems in my mind at night didn't actually belong to me. Almost as if I had no right to worry about them as they were 'Tomorrow's' and not mine.
The more I thought about it, the more I started to see that Tomorrow's problems are just that - Tomorrow's. And as I considered this idea further, I realised that worrying about something that's not yet here is essentially pointless. Until Tomorrow arrives, whatever worries we have about the future will only hold us back from living in the present.
Turns out Tomorrow is a pretty cool chick
Building on this idea in my mind, Tomorrow became a whole live being with arms and legs and a big smiley sunshine for a head! Tomorrow also looked totally chilled about dealing with her problems, and I suddenly felt calmer knowing the worries belonged to Tomorrow and not to Today or to me.
I know it sounds simple and maybe a bit daft but the more strongly I went along with this visualisation in my mind, the less I worried each night. If I find myself worrying now at bedtime, I just tell myself not to as they are Tomorrow's problems. Honestly this works a good 90% of the time and I just fall asleep! So however weird it sounds, I just had to share it to see if it might help someone else too!
I think it probably could and I hopefully haven't lost my marbles entirely! As essentially by shifting our own perspective and seeing Tomorrow as a separate entity capable of handling its own challenges, we can free ourselves from the burdens of the unknown. This mental shift released me from the grip of my worries, back into the present moment, allowing me to then drift off pretty easily.
Given that this idea is free, simple, easy and a little goofey and fun, why not try it next time you are led in bed worrying as the hours go by? I found the trick is to lean into the lunacy. Go along with it full heartedly, like you absolutely know Tomorrow as a living being and you have to leave Tomorrow's problems to them. Focus on imagining what Tomorrow looks like to you and at the very least, this might give you a distraction for a bit from the thing you were worrying about.
Stop circling and sleep
I can also assure you that having been through this a few times, I have handled those problems way better the following day after a good night's sleep than I would have done by stressing for hours, trying to find a solution in the dead of night. I know you feel like you can't sleep until you've solved or sorted it but all your mind really does is go round in circles, getting more tired and never really getting anywhere. A good night's sleep and a fresh start however, tends to bring the solution right to your mind, like magic the next morning.
If you're a fan of meditation and mindful breathing but find it hard to shut your mind off, handing over your thoughts to a physical person you envision called Tomorrow might also be helpful. So be sure to remind yourself that you can't solve Tomorrow's problems until Tomorrow arrives and see if it works as well for you.
The proof is in the pudding
Now of course it would be great if you easily go to sleep tonight and wake up, pleased as punch that this worked for you but why does something so simple work? Well as I've learned to let go of my worries, I've become fascinated by the science behind why worrying about the future can be so detrimental to our well-being. It's not just about feeling anxious or stressed - it's about the actual impact that ruminating can have on our minds and bodies.
When we ruminate on tomorrow's problems, we're essentially creating a cycle of worry that can be hard to break. We like to believe that by thinking it through we are making progress in fixing the problem but actually as our minds tire, we are often getting further from the solution. By letting go of worries instead, we can reduce ruminating and improve our mental health.
Plus there's the effect it has on our sleep when we're stuck in worry mode. Our bodies start to freak out a little bit. Cortisol levels spike, and before we know it, we're wide awake at 3 am, stressing about all the things that could go wrong. It's no wonder we're so tired all the time!
Reframing Our Thinking
But how can we break this cycle of worry and reframe our thinking? By recognising that tomorrow's problems are not ours to worry about, we can start to shift our focus away from the future and towards the present moment. This doesn't mean ignoring our worries altogether - but acknowledging that they are not ours to control, and that we can't solve them until tomorrow arrives.
We can learn to let go and release our worries to focus on what we can control today. So if you're trying to sleep, focus instead on what you have control of in that moment - the comfort of your bed, relaxing your muscles and slowing your breath.
"Worry will never solve tomorrow's problems. It will only take energy away from today."
-James Altucher
I know it's easy to get caught up in the idea that we need to be constantly productive or worried about the future, but trust me, it's not worth it. By letting go of those worries and focusing on what's right in front of us, we can actually start to live more fully.
By letting go and getting a good night's sleep, we can do so much good for our well-being. We can start to make small but powerful positive changes and truly cultivate a greater sense of peace and well-being.
Flip your focus
So in a nut shell, recognising that tomorrow's problems are not ours to worry about can be a powerful tool for reducing anxiety and improving sleep. When we're stuck in worry mode, we're essentially giving away our power to the future. By flipping our focus to the present, we can take back control and start living in a way that feels more authentic and fulfilling.
By adopting this approach, we can break free from the cycle of worry and stress, and instead cultivate a greater sense of peace and well-being. Remember, tomorrow's problems belong to tomorrow - not us. So take a deep breath, let go of your worries, and focus on what you can control today.
The Who -
This feather was inspired by my husband so often telling me 'not to worry'. Turns out he was right (we don't need to tell him that though ;)
Lou @ Feathered Paths Xx
References:
Koster et al. (2013). Rumination and anxiety: A systematic review. Clinical Psychology Review, 33(2), 141-153.
Sleep Health Foundation. (2019). Cortisol and sleep.
Hofmann et al. (2010). The effect of mindfulness-based therapy on anxiety and depression: A meta-analytic review. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 78(2), 169-183.
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